March 15, 2004 - 1:24 AM

Ode To a Jansport (from the hand of a mental 9 year old, namely, me)

I love my new red and black backpack. It's big but not too big with lots of pockets and straps and fasteners and buckles and stuff. There's the main pocket with tons of space and pull and lock straps to play with so that I can tighten up the whole thing and smoosh it all together and a medium sized pocket that can hold, like, a couple notebooks or something and a baby-sized kangaroo pocket for small things like keys and wallets, plus another pocket on the front for pens and pencils and supplies and a pocket on the back that can hold a ginormous hiking water pack bigger than my head and a clip on pocket for cell phones and side pockets for water bottles. Pockets are so rad. And the zippers are real sturdy so that they won't break like on my last backpack which was all black except for a fuzzy leather bottom and only had a large pocket and two smaller pockets and just a few straps and the waist strap broke, like, 2 months after I got it which sucked, but what can you do. So these zippers are much better and the toggles are like superfat so I don't have trouble with them and then the shoulder straps are like an awesome harness that doesn't let the bag sag like the old one so it doesn't hurt my shoulders as much (but it still leaves marks on my shoulders but I think that's because my skin is messed up and gets red marks whenever any shoulder straps rub against it), and then there's the wicked awesome waist strap that's like an inch thick with a buckle that could hold together the earth and a smaller chest strap that help distribute the weight and pull it closer to my body and makes lugging around stuff easier. It's so pretty and looks really cool with my green and black rain jacket and I love it lots, even though the water bottle pockets are way too small to really hold a real water bottle and the top of the backpack balloons out no matter what so that it always looks like I'm carrying around a box even when I'm not which is really dorky. But I love my new red and black backpack.

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I've been getting a lot of search engine hits lately, which is interesting because I'm able to see what search words people are using to find this site. Most of the searches have been for Vienna Teng (she has her voice back), but I've had a few strange ones. The two latest ones were for "dude juicy couture" and "juicy couture marketing", subjects of which this website contains a humongously astounding depository of nothing. Well, except for this entry, a personal favorite wherein I explore my gall with the Butt Billboard fad.

But the best recent search that led someone mistakenly to my diary was for this string of terms: I like the way you smack my ass. The person searching for this phrase must not have been savvy to the ways of search engines, ie. the usage of quotation marks to limit a search to the exact wording of a phrase instead of pages with a random occurence of each word separately. She or he might as well have been searching for You ass I like the smack my way. Quotation Marks- learn to love 'em.

It's weird that my site popped up as one of the first findings under the search engine, because I sure have never used the line "I like the way you smack my ass" on this page until, well, now. Certainly, I say it in real life whenever I see Nick or Tony, but not here. Maybe I should change the title of this diary from "He Went That Way" to "I Like the Way You Smack My Ass". What do you think?

Now Listening To : Patty Griffin-Flaming Red
Random Thought : Y was under the false impression that I've been busy at work. Ha. So very not true. sadly.

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