February 21, 2004 - 1:33 PM

Help Me Get Drunk

It's times like these that I wish I had drinking buddies. People with whom I could sally forth to unwind at a local watering hole after a long week of work. People with whom I could knock back a few ales and shots over fun, stupid conversation. People with whom I could let loose and just get blisteringly wonk-faced.

See, my usual coterie of companions doesn't do these things. Either they are too old for such shenanigans (no offense, tony and matt, but admit it, you are past your plastering days and only drink in moderation now), or they don't find public excessive drinking to be appealing (yeah, that's you Nick).

So here I am, stuck with no one to aide me in satiating my desire for inebriation. And going to a bar alone is out of the question, as is getting pissed solo in my apartment. Where's the fun in that? Unless I've got sorrows to drown, I ain't going there.

For now, though, what to do? I've just completed a 7 day stint wherein I worked 126 hours, the final day of which was a straight shot of 25 hours. I got enough sleep to recover; I've cleaned up my room a bit (it can get messy when you only spend an average of 30 minutes awake in your domicile...dishes pile, laundry pile, mail pile); it's the weekend, I don't have to work today, and won't have to work tomorrow until later in the evening (if at all). I'm aching to get funky. Maybe even down. Some sort of combination of down and funky. Yes. I wants me some scotch!

But all you deadbeats are holding me back. Keeping me from becoming the ass-faced mess I want to become. I rue the days that I met you. All of you.

Not really. I think this is just some latent hostility surfacing from the bad news of earlier this week. You know. The sign of the nigh-ness of Armageddon. A-Rod going to the Yankees. Fuckin' Yankees. Rarrgh!

On the flip side, I'm excited like a dog with a case of elephantiasis of the you-know-whats for the start of Fantasy Baseball season. Tony and I have joined up for a trio of teams via ESPN, and we've started up a new 12 team Yahoo league with a handful of Tony's friends, Nick, my brother Phil, his brother-in-law, and a couple of Phil's friends. Drafting (and the preparation for it) is the best part of the game. Gnawing your fingernails as you make cautious predictions on who will have a breakout year, who will maintain the status quo, and who will be a bust. Wondering if you made the right choice when you picked up Sammy Sosa in front of Vernon Wells. Castrating yourself for letting Mike Mussina slip through your fingers. Hoo baby!

Bring on the competition, you tugnut wankers.

Now Listening To : Jonatha Brooke-Plumb
Random Thought : My friend Victoria who I haven't seen in 3 years is playing at the M-Bar next Wednesday. Join me.

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