January 18, 2004 - 5:26 AM

Crash Crash Crash Crash Into Me

Asspants crumducker shinnypinny pumpnuggets! I got to see four stages of "The Automobile Collision Scenario" today, and, unfortunately, I was involved in one of them.

12:15 PM- Initial Collision I'm on Huston, a two-way street, one lane each, that runs East/West. A little before the traffic light where it intersects Van Nuys Boulevard, it widens to allow for curbside parking; but there is enough red curb right before the intersection to allow for a right-hand turn lane. I pull up to the red light and sidle into that right hand lane. On my left, in the normal lane, is a beige SUV that blocks my view of the cars coming from that side. Perpendicular to me, traffic on Van Nuys (2 lanes each way, with 3rd lanes next to the sidewalks that are ostensibly for metered street parking, but are often used by buttmonkey drivers who want to speed past everyone else) is steady, and my eye catches a silver Mercedes coupe coming from the right. I look at the green light that signals them to keep going, waiting for it to turn yellow so that I will know when it's MY turn to go.

Sccuuuuuuureeeech! THHHWUCK! Skiiish.

That's what I hear coming from the left, just beyond the front end of the neighbor SUV that has been shoved a few inches towards me. Debris flies around me, and the rear end of the silver Mercedes sadly rolls backwards, from left to right, into my view, peeking dazedly around the front fender of the SUV at me. Another SUV, this one silver, inches in front of me, also from the left, on Van Nuys in the 3rd lane, lurching to a stop right after my corner turn. It seems to be as visibly shaken as its driver, a man who climbs gingerly down from his door and limps to the sidewalk.

I'm confused as to what exactly happened, since I thought that the silver Mercedes was just going straight on through the intersection. Later, I piece together what I think happened: the Mercedes was probably making a left turn onto Huston while there was a break in oncoming traffic, but she didn't see the silver SUV barrelling down the 3rd lane towards her. The SUV slammed on the breaks (the screech), but still pummeled into the Mercedes which was at that point parallel to me on Huston (the thwuck), which then smacked into the beige SUV.

Slowly I gather my thoughts, wondering if I should call 911. I see a young woman open the door to the Mercedes, quite distraught, but not apparently harmed. The back left section of the car is crunked in, there's glass all over the road. I turn off my car, get out, and check on the older woman in the SUV next to me. She's shocked. I tap on the passenger side window and ask if she's ok. She looks at me and sorta shrugs as if to say "sure, i guess...hey, wow, look at what just happened." Looking back around the front of the SUV, I see that a handsome young man has run over to the girl from the Mercedes and is checking to see how she is. He then hops in the driver seat and maneuvers the car around so that it can park on Huston, out of the way of traffic. Another SUV on Van Nuys drives forward and parks in front of the injured silver one; several guys get out and check on that driver, who's still limping. They appear to be friends of his.

Cars are piling up behind me and the beige SUV with nowhere to go. I'm conflicted about whether I should stay to help out and give a statement to the police, or if I should just move on and get to work. By now, I think, someone has called 911; also, we're right next to the Sherman Oaks hospital, so any injuries will be taken care of. Something's gotta give with the honking cars of Huston, and, realizing that I wouldn't be able to give any useful information to the cops seeing as I didn't witness anything, I hop back in my car and slowly drive onto Van Nuys to get to the freeway. I feel really guilty about leaving the scene of an accident, but I have to get to work, the victims are being taken care of (except for the woman in the SUV), and there's an ambulance already at the intersection.

12:28 PM-Collision Aftermath:The Cleanup I've just gotten on the 101 Freeway, heading East (south). Traffic is backed up because, at the very next exit (Woodman), two police cars and a tow truck are loading up a damaged vehicle. Lookyloo congestion breaks up just past that scene.

12:39 PM-Collision Reaction I'm now taking the exit ramp off the 134 freeway onto Cahuenga. Right across the ramp/Cahuenga intersection, at the bottom of the ramp that services the entrance back onto the 134, two cops are getting information from the occupants of two bashed up cars while a Parking Enforcement person is directing traffic. The passengers appear to be alright, although both cars have ended up on the uphill enbankment over the curb to the left of the onramp. I make the left onto Cahuenga to head towards the studio.

3:07 AM-Collision Decision I've left my car all day on the residential side street next to the studio. Since I've been busy, I haven't been out to the car once. I don't notice anything wrong with the car...why should I? Nothing's happened before. Upon leaving, I notice that my curbside wheels are wedged against the curb, and there is tight rubbing when I pull forward. That's odd since, when I parked that morning, I drove forward into the space and didn't feel any contact with the curb. A few minutes later, while driving down Magnolia with Erin McKeown playing on the cd player, the wind on my left begins to divert my attention from the music. I play with the windows several times; at 3 stop lights, I open and close my door. The windy noise persists. The sounds outside my car are markedly louder than I'm used to. I wonder if this has always been the case ever since I had to have most of the rear half of the car frame replaced last spring when I backed into a pole. I think that maybe the car repair guys didn't do such a good job of making the seam between the door and the frame tight, and that now I'm noticing it. But that doesn't seem right.

When I get home, I run my fingers along the inside and outside seams of both the passenger and driver side doors. The passenger side door is flush with the frame all the way around. The driver door is a different story. The aftward part of the door is just slightly out and above the frame, while the forward part of the door is slightly depressed below the frame. Realizing that the door has somehow been jostled such that the front section points in and the back section sticks out, I examine the surface of the front part. And there it is. An ugly, amorphous dent on the lower portion, slightly behind the position of the rear-view mirror. The scrapes that accompany the dent are not so severe as to reveal the metal beneath; in fact, they almost match the color of the grime and dirt that festoons the rest of my car in such a way as to camouflage the wound.

Cursing under my breath, I put two and two together. Some cockbite sideswiped my parked car while I was working, pushing it into the curb, then drove on with nary a second thought. And now, I will have to contact my insurance company to see if they will cover the costs of repair.

Perhaps this final collision of the day is some sort of karmic retribution for not having stayed at the scene of the first one to offer more of my help. Ah me.

Now Listening To : Erin McKeown-Grand
Random Thought : Ashanti is actually a good singer. Not the biggest range, but she has good control, nice tone, and a great head for melodies.

What I Just Wrote Before - What I'm About to Write

The Five Most Recent Entries

Here's a hand-picked playlist of 40-plus songs for you to listen to: